WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE

WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE

Or so many people would have us believe. you have to love the media. I mean it takes balls to lie day in day out for money. They are certainly better actors than most of the crappy “stars” Hollywood has these days.

The most usual sensationalism these days are negative, mainly because it sells. If it was between man saves cat and world to end in 10 minutes, well, I probably wouldn’t be standing around reading a newspaper but still, the second one does sound more interesting. It’s a shame that most of those sort of stories are complete bollocks anyway. Ah well.

There are a couple of examples of excellent media sensationalism. When they are desperate and/or bored, they’ll take anything. SARs was one of these ‘killer’ diseases that was going to kill everyone and take us back to the dark ages. Awesome, sounds like we have a weapon against twats. However it wasn’t quite as good as we thought. In fact as far as it goes, it was the retarded brother of influenza, that was kept in the cupboard and not let out because it was so fucking stupid. This disease was making headlines for killing about 2 people (well, 774) or something silly is Asia. It hadn’t even made it over into Europe yet, let alone England, and we were still all going to die. The mortality rate was less than 10%. Of the 4 people in the UK who got it, not one died.

So why the big problems? Who knows. Had this have been around for years on end, like the flu, then nobody would have cared. However it was a new-ish virus so everyone was going to die, and nobody could convince anyone otherwise.

Bird Flu is another awesome example. Apparently that was going to destroy life as we knew it over here in the U.K. People went crazy, started stocking up on supplies and stupid things like this. Why? Because the papers and media said we were all going to die from new disease #8475. Cheers jackasses, you’ve just proved you know dickall about diseases, especially how they travel. The chances of people coming into direct contact with birds on a day to day basis, especially ones that have the disease is tiny. I know people have some crazy fetishes these days, but I prefer not to put my dick in a bird’s mouth, especially if I don’t know where it has been. Currently the mortality rate is high, at just over 60%. Well at least it’s a killer. But ther have only been 369 cases in the world that have been recorded. And they predict this thing will kill anywhere between 5million to 150million. What sort of prediction is that? I’ve got my own prediction. Dieing whilst getting raped by a mutated squirrel could kill anywhere between 0 and 9billion people! Fuck me, let’s start preparing now. Bollocks.

Lastly, the greatest sensationalism has to be global warming. Everytime I hear someone go on about global warming I want to punch them. If I wanna drive a car and spray deodorant then I will. I think that picking on deodrant is just an excuse as to why hippies smell so bad.

Anyway, global warming apparently is going to kill everyone in the world and just basically cause ice ages, heat waves, global storms and probably AIDs. Well at least they have tried to model what is going to happen, but no one can agree. Apparently everything is heating up by 3 degrees farenheit. Well that’s it, human race down the pan. Oh and that’s in about 100 years. The previous 100 years it went up by 1 by itself. Now let’s say it did heat up hugely, then that big thing is that the ice is going to melt and then the AIDs spreads or something vaguely similar. Small problem, there is actually more ice now than there was back in 1980. About 1million square km more actually. Here’s a diagram:

SO MUCH MELTING

So even if we went on a melting spree, we are going to have a tough time to get back where we were. They are even taken in the same month.

Let’s continue the story. We get to it cooling down that good old Gulf Stream (even though according to some, the oceans are getting warmer as well). Well basically it’s all bollocks to. It isn’t going to happen. If it did we apparently would enter an ice age, so it that excess water would be gone, and then the Polar Bears would be fine.

Basically most of the evidence brought forward is a possible cause of global warming which is a natural activity anyway. For every study of global warming there is a counter study. It’s impossible to tell. I wouldn’t mind England being a little warming, it’s fucking freezing here. If it gets really icy, well I couldn’t care really, at least I could make a snow dick or something funny.

All this sensationalism is complete rubbish. People who want to feel happy that they are saving the Earth going too far and making up stuff and making nothing more than guesses at what might happen if we let a natural process happen. Scientists are now even suggesting we artficially cool the Earth which could result in deaths of people where it is already fucking cold anyway. Anyone think of them. Of course not. If you think your gonna die from the big evil of global warming your a fucking retard. Go get a science book. Or do us all a favour and go and protest something useless like Scientology.

~ by dantheman999 on 19 July, 2008.